Finding Truth in Self

Sometimes there is a need for reflection. I find myself having to put my life back together, in more ways than one. Summer wasn’t very kind to me this year, full of stresses that I don’t wish upon anyone.  To finish the summer a person I adored left me for reasons that still don’t quite make sense. I find myself in a lonesome state of heartache.  But with these trials come new adventures, I decided to spend some quality time with myself, to ponder my existence, my future, my immediate situation. I chose this over getting a tattoo…well; I probably will get that too. However in the mean time, it’s time for me to find myself again, to alight myself within the universe. To do this I’m spending a week in the Cochise National Forest, I found a lovely yurt with a wood burning stove. To say the least, I will be encompassed by nature which is what I’ve been missing in my life. Plus I get to live in fucking yurt…so excited!  I’m pretty sure I’ve packed more food then clothes, but I do have my priorities. While on my quest for self discovery, I’m going to attempt to hike the Humphrey Trail to the San Francisco Peak (12,633'), a 9 mile roundtrip hike to the highest point in Arizona. Of course, pictures will be posted so don’t worry. Hopefully standing on a mountain will give me a better view of life and how minuscule my problems really are. 
Wish me luck.

Just Kids

I just finished reading Just Kids by Patti Smith. What a wonderful book about two amazing artists. I was introduced to Patti Smith about 6 years ago. I found her voice amazing, her lyrics heart wrenching, and an amazing poet with an amazing life. She was the lover and friend of Robert Mapplethorpe. Both their works controversial. As a fan of black and white photography, and a fan of true rock-n-roll, I absolutely fell in love with this book. It inspires not only creativity, but makes you wonder if in this time of narcissism if a true connection to another human being is really achievable. Their love and admiration for one another tugged my heartstrings in a way that I cannot explain. For those of you who appreciate art of various mediums, I hope that you will find this book as inspiring as I did.

Patti Smith - By Robert Mapplethrope 1977

Muir Woods National Monument

Yesterday I went to Muir Woods National Monument with my mom. This is my third trip to the woods. It was crazy busy on Saturday, didn't quite think that one through, but it was still a fun and beautiful day.



This park is very much geared towards ecotourism. So many tourists, so many screaming kids, but what was funny is that as you continued down the path, past the 1 mile mark, the less people that were there. It started to fad out to the people that actually wanted to come and hike mount Tamalpais. There were many cool trails that took you to Stinson Beach, however, my mother isn't exactly the "walking' type, so hiking up a hill for about 3 miles wasn't so appealing to her.

Sequoia's 

The Metamorphism of the Roots 

The Ferns

Clovers covered with morning due

Carlsbad Caverns

On the way to the caverns we had to travel through West Texas. It was a warm dry day, the sun was intense, even more so then in Arizona. This road was desolate, only passing a few cars here and there. The clouds were amazing. It just makes you think about how different the regions in America can be. The landscape seemed endless, and the vastness of place could make you feel as though you were just a speck in a petri dish.  

Finally we made it Carlsbad Caverns in New Mexico. I've been wanting to visit the caverns since I was a kid. Luckily I have an awesome partner that was just as eager as me  to go there. We entered the caves through the natural entrance that took us below the earth about 800ft. The descent was amazing, I believe we walked about a mile and half down a very steep descent till we reached the main room that was littered with stalactites and stalagmites, to say the least, it was amazing. Is was as if we had entered an extraterritorial world.  

The chill and dampness in the air created an atmosphere that was a little creepy, but at the same time it was a relief from the heat that was outside.  

 The day we left Carlsbad a storm system moved in. Thunder, lightning, and rain. It moved across New Mexico and Texas. This photo was on the plains across west Texas, although I'm sure that is New Mexico in the background. 

As we entered Carlsbad we had to pass through the Guadalupe National Park in Tx. This is Texas's highest point at over 8000 ft. David wants to climb it. It was beautiful peak and I wish we had time to explore it. 

New Vacation Plan

Well I had to use 3/4 of my vacation fund to pay-off my debt at school so that only left me about $500, which is a lot but at the same time is not. So in an effort to still get what I want, I'm devising a plan to take a week in Austin, TX and hit-up a music venue every night I'm there. I think it's a novel plan if I should say so myself. Since originally the plan was to take a month long road trip from Tucson, up through Colorado, to Chicago, New York, DC, back through Tennessee, with a final stop in Austin before heading home.

 

Here are some options while there:

6/5 Dillinger Four

6/6 Weezer

6/7 Little Scream

6/8 Noah and the Whale

6/9 The Gourds

6/10 Wayne "the train" Hancock

6/11 Matt & Kim / The Thermals / Autobots

6/12 Adele

6/13 Guy Clark

6/14 Widespread Panic

6/15 Hate Eternal

6/16 My Education

6/17 Two Tones of Steel

 

Now yes this is more than a week's worth, but I had to see which week I wanted to go.

I'm think of just camping in my car for the trip. I think it could be an amazing adventure. I don't know all of these bands so if you have any suggestions let me know. Frankly, I don't really care what type of music I just want to hear it live with good food, a cold drink, and a new friend.

 

Currently listening to Spoon: http://video.pbs.org/video/1609788516

 

The Start of a New

Dearest Blog,

How I have been neglecting you is horrible. I'm sorry.

So here we go…

I'm officially withdrawn from school. Papers signed, moneys returned, school stresses relieved. Now you might be asking yourself "why?" Well there are two reasons, two very strong and emotional reasons.
(1) Back in late February/March my grandfather was admitted to hospital. He suffers from respiratory problems and wasn't getting enough oxygen which was causing himself to be poisoned by the CO2 that wasn't escaping his blood stream. Luckily he pulled out of it, but is significantly diminished by the whole ordeal.
(2) I was doubting my potential profession. I love a lot of things about architecture, and how cool is it be asked what you do for a living and answer, "I'm an architect". But being able to say that requires a lot of sacrifices, time, passion, and commitment, being political, and of course wearing the most stylish clothes. Most of my peers dream of building these egotistical monuments to one's self, while a hand full of us actually care about what we are doing the world and the effects that "we" have on our community. However, the later is not as celebrated.

So here I was in my second semester of my third year in architecture school when I realized that this wasn't what I wanted to do. As a matter of fact, and this is kind of silly in hindsight, but on my third day of class I was working late in studio and I just broke down and cried. Now there are only a handful of people that have ever seen me cry, luckily I was by myself. My realization was sad for several reasons, but I won't go into that at this time.

With this time off I hope that I can discover more about myself and what I want to do with my life. I've been lost before and now I'm lost again and it sucks balls. I wish that my time away from school would give me more insight into myself, but for now, I feel out of control when it comes to school and having a plan. The only thing that I have realized is that we really have a limited time on this earth, and it's up to us to make the best out of it that we can. I can make a list of things I want to see and do, as I'm sure everyone has done at some point in their lives, but in the end most of those people never complete their bucket list. I'm sure it's a sad realization for people when they get to the end and realize that they never completed what they hoped to achieve. Now I'm sure that the hiccups in the road were all valuable to their lives, but I hope to find a way to have hiccups, travels, and aspirations all realized before I die. With this said, it makes me really search my soul for my calling. I will never know for sure what that is because I have a sneaky suspicion that life will interrupt or change that ideal that I have, but what I do know for sure is that I'm not going to put anything off and I'm going to take the opportunities that are placed in front of me, and I'm going to enjoy every bit of it.

Enough rambling for now. I hope to keep up this blog up with remarkable experiences, new places, and good friends.

Night Rider Pt.2

Dec. 10^th 2010

A splendid day had just occurred. I had an awesome morning, lunch with friends, funnel cake, and had been awarded a scholarship. So I felt as thought I had to celebrate this amazing day.

My travels took me down University to Stone Ave. were I stopped in on a friend to say Hi. I proceeded my way down Stone into Downtown. Along the way I stopped for signage that I thought was cool.

First Stop: The Sahara College Apartments, an old hotel that has been turned into student housing. This place is surrounded by  an ugly ominous fence, it really looks uninviting and they painted it this ugly ass purple color. But….the sign is cool. Every time I drive past this sign I think Vegas 1960’s. 

As I continued my way downtown, I detoured off the Stone and headed towards the Tucson Museum of Art. Now, I was originally going to take a photo of the giant donut that lights up in the middle of the road, but I was put off by two bums that I thought would sure jump a girl on a bike with a $1000 camera. So instead I rolled around the corner and thought that the lighting and shadows of the sign made for an interesting shot. It didn’t come out like I wanted but it’s still a little trippy.

Speeding past the bums, I made my way down to Congress. I jumped off my bike at the bus terminal because it was busy and there is not enough room to ride on the sidewalk. I past another bum who said, “it’s nice to see you again”….Hummm I thought! Do I have a reputation down here? I really need to hang out in other places. So along my walking route I pasted a friend’s store. It has a cool sign so I went for it.

Then the photographs stopped.

Not because I didn’t want to….well….hang on a sec. To be honest, I wasn’t feeling the camera that night, so I opted for celebrating with spirits rather than with art.

I will leave out most of what happened after I put the camera away….but I finally ended up at bar and watched Devil Doll perform.